Today I had an interesting conversation with someone. (Read: today I had an annoying conversation with someone). She spent a handful of (my precious) minutes complaining and complaining about a particular situation. While listening to her lament, which is a common occurance between the two of us, I realized something. She is constantly presenting problems to me, but never looking for a solution. After mentioning the problem, then elaborating, she proceeds with some consistent version of " I'm not going to be the one to (fill in the blank)." And I can't help but think, "Really? Because if you're the one with the problem, why aren't you the one looking for a solution and being willing to change?"
How many times have I been the person described above?! Well....probably too many, but it took all those times for me to realize that if I want a change in my life. I have to be the one to do something. We can't control people. We can't change people. We can't force people to do anything they don't want to do (even if we can manipulate...that's not change....it's just fooling ourselves into thinking we've done the impossible). What we CAN do, is change ourselves, control our reactions to other people, and force ourselves to grow into a person that loves and accepts anyone for who they are and where they are, and not for who we wish they would be. I am not saying that I have arrived at this, but I am saying it's aspiring and that today I remembered to reach for it.
Do you have a persistent problem in your life that you have been complaining about without trying to resolve? Why are you avoiding resolution?
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